A brief moment of your time

Started by hider1, April 05, 2006, 12:41:06 AM

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Sanicanka

#15
Not funny at all!!!!


lol What happened to that stupid joke :D Now my post looks stupid !

BlueMouse

Hard Girl

Three girls are sitting around, totally bored so one girl suggests that they make up nicknames for their ideal boyfriends and name them after soda pops.

"I want mine to be 7-Up, 'cause 7 days a week he's up."

"I want mine to be Mountain Dew 'cause when he's in between my mountains, we'll be doing it."

"Mine's gonna be Jack Daniel's."

"You can't do that. Here we are talking about soda pop and you're talking about a hard liquor."

"Exactly."

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Kissforfun

A handsome young lad went into the hospital for some minor surgery, and the day after the procedure a friend stopped by to see how the guy was doing. His friend was amazed at the number of nurses who entered the room in short intervals with refreshments, offers to fluff his pillows, make the bed, give back rubs, etc. "Why all the attention?" the friend asked, "You look fine to me."

"I know!" grinned the patient. "But the nurses kind of formed a little fan club when they all heard that my circumcision required twenty-seven stitches."


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EvoluGion

Hello!

A woman went to her doctor to verify that she was pregnant. This was her first pregnancy. So she said to the doctor "I'm worried about the pain. How much will childbirth hurt?"
The doctor answered, "Well, that varies from woman to woman and pregnancy to pregnancy and besides, it's difficult to describe pain."
"I know, but can't you give me some idea?" she asks.
"Grab your upper lip and pull it out a little..."said the Doctor
"Like this?"
"A little more..."
"Like this?"
"No. A little more..."
"Like this?"
"Yes. Does that hurt?"
"A little bit."
"Now stretch it over your head!"


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LadyBrowser

A husband and wife decided they needed to use "a code" to indicate that they
wanted to have sex without letting their children in on it.
They decided on the word "typewriter." One day the husband told his five year old daughter,
"Go tell your mommy that daddy needs to type a letter."
The child told her mom what her dad said and her mother responded,
"Tell your daddy that he can't type a letter right now because there's a red ribbon in the typewriter."
The child went back to tell her father what mommy had said. A few days later the mom told the daughter,
"Tell daddy that he can type that letter now." The child told her father, returned to her mother and announced,
"Daddy said never mind with the typewriter, he already wrote the letter by hand."


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GirlWomans

A priest was lecturing on the Bible one Sunday morning. He said to the congregation, "You know, the Bible has an answer for everything. The reason
for that is that the people in the Bible have all, at one time or another, been in the same situations you have."

"Even PMS?" a woman asked.

"Yes, I assure you, PMS is in there. Tell you what, I'll look for it and tell you the passage at Mass next week."

So everyone goes home and the priest is looking for the passage and Sunday comes around. He gets in front of the congregation and begins his Homily in mass.

"People, I have found the passage in the Bible referring to PMS."

"Really, Father? Where?" the lady asked.

It's right here in this passage where it says "And Mary rode Josephs' ass all the way to Bethlehem."


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